Fortune Cookie Proves Useful For First Time In Recorded History

Fortune cookies. The pot of worthless, stale gold at the end of every greasy Chinese buffet line. The disappointing freebee you eat before falling into that MSG induced coma we’ve all experienced too many times to count. The graham crackers twisted little, less appealing cousin. The dessert any self respecting adult deserts at the table. The kinda vagina looking cookie wishbone you have to break in half just so you don’t eat fucking paper as you shovel it into your mouth, as if the 12,000 calories of cold fried rice and three week old imitation crab rangoon wasn’t enough for one meal. The... Ok you get the point. Fortune cookies suck. They do. That is until 60 year old Gabriel Fierro decided he would use the numbers from one to win 4 million dollars playing the lottery. 

Why the hell didn’t I think of that? Has no one ever tried this before?!? Maybe we’ve been misjudging them all along. 

I guess that old saying is correct... Never judge a cookie by the dirty piece of paper someone put in it.