Cover Up Your Back Acne, At Least On The Plane…
Is it just me, or does it take an absolutely bat shit crazy, off in la la land type of person to wear an open backed shirt on an airplane, especially if they have terrible back acne? Am I just crazy? Does anybody else notice this? The sheer number of people I see traveling with garments that put their zits on display is nothing short of astonishing to me. I can’t be the only person who notices this, and I wouldn’t be caught dead leaving the house in anything but a properly covering shirt if between my shoulder blades was currently the fourth largest mountain chain in North America. Call my crazy. Call me an asshole. Call me whatever you want. But the next time you’re sitting behind me on an airplane you can be rest assured that you won’t be studying my backne like they’re constellations in the night sky.
And I get it. That skin can be an uncooperative cold hearted son of a bitch. I suffer the same fate. But seriously. You have to be another breed of human to be ok with rubbing your back grease against the already present wax museum on any airplane seat when you’re already struggling with breakouts. Plus we have TVs on the back of planes and I’m not trying to watch Mila Kunis and JT get it on in ‘Friends with Benefits’ when I got some Dr. Pimple Popper thumbnail in the background. And of course I’m going to stare at it. And study it. I can’t help it. Human nature. It’s like a car crash. Do I want to see a dude’s exploded head fifty yards from where it left his body? Fuck no. Then why have I stared at literally every single car crash I’ve ever driven by? The hell if I know! Same as the zitty back on the plane situation. Our eyes hate us sometimes.
What does it take for a human to wear a garment that allows me to study their back like this from afar without seemingly a care in the world anyway? Or at least this god damn plane. And again to be on a plane wearing this. Oh no my fair lady. What disease has infected your sense of direction in navigating life’s most obvious paths separating us from being a normal human being and an absolute menace to society?
Stuff like this. That’s what. From one shitty skinned, zit infected individual to another… cover it up. Thank you.
P.S. I realize this may sound a bit harsh, at least to some of you. Imagine how I feel trying to eat the already disgusting pepperoni from the meat tray I overpaid for while I’m staring at the pizza on your back? Yeah. Not everything is just about you ya know. Again I deal with it too. I just don’t advertise the shit like it isn’t gross to look at it.